This; And also that

Earth, Wind, and Fire Fighters

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It’s comforting to know we still have fire fighters amongst us — people dedicated to finding fires and then fighting them. Fire needs to be fought. There are other primal forces that need to be fought, of course. I’d like to be a wind fighter. I’d go around putting out dangerous winds. Or perhaps a … Read more

One of the best hugs

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you’ll ever get from your six-year-old is the one that comes after you’ve taken him and a friend of his trick or treating two skipping ninjas out in the dark going as long and as far as they want extracting candy ninja-style from houses you were sure weren’t open for trick or treat business. Then … Read more

The Middle Ages

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I’m 39 and convinced that I’m middle aged. Which is fine by me. In fact, I like it. It’s kind of like I’m floating around in the middle of a lake in an inflatable tube. There’s lots of water on all sides. My feet are trailing in the water while my head leans back onto … Read more

If I had a coffeehouse

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If I had a coffeehouse, this would be my motto: “A frightened clientele is an obedient clientele.” Or perhaps: “A nervous clientele is a loyal clientele.” I’d spray my customers with hormones as they walked through the door. To mark them. I’d control the colors they wore. I’d make the colors dance for me. Dance … Read more

Lego my Torah

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My 6-year-old son’s having a playdate right now. There are clinking noises and murmurs coming through the open door to his room. And then I hear my son say this: “I’ll trade you a Jewish Bible.” A what?! You heard right, he’s trying to trade his friend a Torah, that ancient fount of sacred wisdom. … Read more

A little wahoo

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Shampoo was nice enough to publish/post one of my poems this week in Issue 28 (under my so-called “real name”). It’s an excellent issue, including a poem by Rodney Koeneke, one of my favorite living Americans. If ya get a chance, checkitout. This little wahoo got me to add a Published category over on the … Read more

$19.80

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Buying sushi tonight, the bill comes to $19.80, and the nice guy at the register laughs “1980! — that was a good year!” “Yeah!” I sez. “Yeah.” And I hand him my credit card. “You had hair down to your ass!” he says to me, “I bet.” And this gives me pause. Where exactly did … Read more