Scanning the site’s traffic log tonight I learned two incredible facts:
(1) Because of a pair of lines in a pair of poems… if you search “exotic bird parks” and “Utah” in Google, not only is cecilvortex.com the first choice you get, cecilvortex.com is the only choice you get.
Amazing!
(2) Somebody — some actual human being — appears to have actually searched for “exotic bird parks” and “Utah” on Google and then clicked through to this site.
And!: Not only is all this true, but it’s a genuine double-true fact that my writing about this whole thing — right now! will only reinforce cecilvortex.com’s dominant position in this space.
Now I have to say, it’s not like this is anything I ever really aspired to. I mean, it wasn’t part of my master plan when cecilvortex.com started up or anything. But of course, now that I’m here, now that I’ve arrived, I plan to hold on like grim death.
So for this magical moment and for the foreseeable future, also magical, if you’ve come here in search of information regarding exotic bird parks in Utah, let me just say:
Welcome home.
In somewhat related news, and I know pretty soon it’s gonna start to sound like I’m bragging but… it appears that cecilvortex.com is also the number two (and perhaps soon, number one…?) Google result for “he peed in me.” Triple-true that. Check for yourself, if you dare.
All in all, I feel like I finally have a small feel for what it must be like to be Spider Man. The challenge now, if I can loosely paraphrase Ben Parker, is to find a way to use this awesome power for good.
"…something like the supervisor of an entire team of political agents…"
Computer Game Designer Bob Roland once lamented online that his name is the only reference in yahoo’s search engine for the made-up word, “mancock” – thanks in no small part to the army of dissenting disgruntled players of Jumpgate Online.
An observation first brought to his attention by his loving, but internet shy spouse.
the moral: it could be worse.
Arcadian Del Sol, interesting, and if you google “man cock” as opposed to “mancock”, trust me, the results are intensely more askew than bob roland’s lamentable 15 minutes. and, more expensive.
cecil, i caution thee on thine’s power, for
“Power, like a desolating pestilence,
Pollutes whatever it touches; and obedience,
Bane of all genius, virtue, freedom, truth,
Makes slaves of men, and of the human frame
A mechanized automaton.”
—Percy Bysshe Shelley (1792-1822), not exactly the peppiest of all poets
“Fall is my favorite season in Los Angeles, watching the birds change color and fall from the trees.”
—David Letterman (1947 – )
“Half of the modern drugs could well be thrown out of the window, except that the birds might eat them.”
—Dr. Martin Henry Fischer
I’ve travelled Utah a little, and I’ve been a birder, and I can attest that there is birding to do in Utah. And if there are natural birds there, then why would they want unnatural preserves for alien birds?
And if the people of Utah don’t want them, then by god you should not be foisting them upon the good people of Utah!
Damn you, Cecil Vortex, defeater of the will of the people!
Dear so-called the RaptorMage,
The people of Utah must understand that I am their master!
Sincerely,
-Cecil Vortex