It’s comforting to know we still have fire fighters amongst us — people dedicated to finding fires and then fighting them. Fire needs to be fought. There are other primal forces that need to be fought, of course. I’d like…
Category: This; And also that
One of the best hugs
you’ll ever get from your six-year-old is the one that comes after you’ve taken him and a friend of his trick or treating two skipping ninjas out in the dark going as long and as far as they want extracting…
The Middle Ages
I’m 39 and convinced that I’m middle aged. Which is fine by me. In fact, I like it. It’s kind of like I’m floating around in the middle of a lake in an inflatable tube. There’s lots of water on…
If I had a coffeehouse
If I had a coffeehouse, this would be my motto: “A frightened clientele is an obedient clientele.” Or perhaps: “A nervous clientele is a loyal clientele.” I’d spray my customers with hormones as they walked through the door. To mark…
Nibble groove
Crickly crack. Warm mice pop spin slice. Crickle. Are eating my crickly. Eating my crickly music. music. music. 0
Lego my Torah
My 6-year-old son’s having a playdate right now. There are clinking noises and murmurs coming through the open door to his room. And then I hear my son say this: “I’ll trade you a Jewish Bible.” A what?! You heard…
A little wahoo
Shampoo was nice enough to publish/post one of my poems this week in Issue 28 (under my so-called “real name”). It’s an excellent issue, including a poem by Rodney Koeneke, one of my favorite living Americans. If ya get a…
$19.80
Buying sushi tonight, the bill comes to $19.80, and the nice guy at the register laughs “1980! — that was a good year!” “Yeah!” I sez. “Yeah.” And I hand him my credit card. “You had hair down to your…
I defy you
to name me that movie one better be wouldn’t male lead with neil patrick harris. with neil patrick harris. with patrick neil harris. 0
The Greatest Almost Entirely True Work Story Ever Told
It was another busy day at Amalgamated Skills — “Where we bring you the skills that you use to do things better than you would do otherwise, if you didn’t have the skills that we bring you.” Rhett Kronkhead, the…