Travel Log

We grab a cab in Zurich and head from the airport to our hotel. The first thing I notice is that the Swiss people are gigantic. The men are 8-9 feet tall. The women, even larger.
I see them loping across the street. They’re tall and thin and they make no noise as they move, except when they reach up to tear an odd leaf off a tree. There’s a rough, rumbling sound when they chew that makes me uncomfortable.
Why isn’t this talked about in the outside world? More to come…

Nothing sounds more like the future to me than a hybrid British accent — someone speaking with an accent that’s part English, part something else.
At the Amsterdam airport we hear a woman on the PA with an accent that’s 40% Dutch, 60% BBC. Over and over, in fabulously layered tones, she announces: “Passenger [X] for [destination y], you are delaying your flight. We will proceed to [pause] offload your luggage.” If I close my eyes, it could be the year 2417.
I keep waiting for her to say “Passenger Davis for Titan, you are delaying your flight. We will proceed to [pause] vaporize your luggage.”
Still waiting.

I’m on the road right now, and for the next little bit this site will be transformed into a travel journal. I know you’re busy so I’ll try to boil things down to only the most salient observations. For example, this first one, I think you’ll agree, is almost entirely salient.
Leaving town yesterday afternoon, I saw a sign in the international terminal at San Francisco Airport. It read: “Gourmet Chocolate Lollipops: A California Tradition.”
Adding avocado to our sushi, that’s a California Tradition. We also like panning for gold and hypnotizing each other. Sometimes we tame wild grizzlies and ride them around our 1200-square-foot bungalows shouting “Hyah, little pony! Hyah!” These are all legitimate California Traditions.
But gourmet chocolate lollipops?
Please.