This; And also that

I just saw the most disgusting thing on CNN. Wolf Blitzer says to his guest, “May I pick your brain for a moment?” And the guest says, “Sure.”
I’m sorry — I just got up and turned off the TV. … Read on Macduff...

is what this fellow shouts
at me and my chat-mate.
We’re sitting on a bench,
enjoying the East Bay sun.
He comes up to us
holding a black garbage bag.
He puts the bag down
next to us on the … Read on Macduff...

They named a drug
designed to help men urinate
“Flomax.”
(They really did.
They called it “Flomax.”
Can you
imagine the joy in
that room? “Flomax!”
“Oh my God — we’re going to
call it ‘Flomax!’ Somebody, do a trademark… Read on Macduff...

He sounds surprised
at everything he says he’s
constantly surprising himself.
“Is there food somewhere around here?” is what I asked.
“There is?!” he self-flabbergasted. “Nordic Sub Shop — right next door?! Good food?!?”
Surprise, surprise, surprise.

I have this recurring dream in which the brakes in my car give out. The shudder these dreams share is that moment when I’m pressing down but the car careens.
I’ve had this dream in various forms for probably twenty … Read on Macduff...

This morning while dropping my kids off at school, it occurred to me that California is now my home. I’ve lived here longer than I’ve lived anywhere else.
I spent seventeen years on the east coast, interrupted by five years … Read on Macduff...

Lovely. (Link via ye olde zefrank.com.

You probably can’t tell from this blog, but I’m an exceptionally accomplished fellow. For example: I once taught a family of gerbils how to sign “hello” and “nice to see you.” I can hold my breath for three hours. From … Read on Macduff...